Q and A

KM from Nashville, Tennessee asks...

Finding the Right One

Dear Junebug: What advice can you offer someone who is a Christian who wants to find “the right one”?

Posted in Love on Tue, Aug 17th 2010


Dear KM:

First, you must pray and trust in God to give you the perfect partner that He has created just for you. Now you have a part in this as well. You should be the reciprocal of what you desire in a potential mate. For example, if you are looking for an interesting, attractive person, you in turn must strive to be appealing.

Second, be wise in where you choose to look for your future mate. If you don’t want a drunk, then stay away from bars. If you are into physical fitness, join a gym. If you are into healthy eating, spend some time in a health food grocery store. Try the “3-G’s” - Get gregarious in the grocery.

Third, get involved! Do volunteer work. Join a coed Bible study. Walk a popular walking/hiking trail. Go to yard sales. Have a yard sale!  All  these are excellent ways to meet your possible mate.

Most important, do not let yourself become desperate. This may cause you to settle for less and you could potentially scare off “Mr. Right”. Don’t ever forget: Men love a challenge!

Remember, the perfect body will initially attract a man, but does not have staying power. Keep a good sense of humor, stay interesting, and be yourself; knowing God will provide in His perfect timing. In the meantime, while you wait, don’t forget to have fun with whomever you meet!


Mitchell from Columbus, Ohio asks...

Off the Beaten Path

Dear Junebug: I am a student who has completed my first year of college. My parents are adamant that I stay enrolled, but I don't feel like a four year degree is really for me. What else can I do for my future?

Posted in College on Tue, Aug 17th 2010

Stay the Course

Dear Mitchell:

Since you are uncertain as to your future plans and your parents prefer you to continue your college education, why not take next semester and register for two or three classes that peak your interest. For example, if your passion is music, you may want to take a class on the history of classical music. If you are a sports enthusiast, then a sports broadcasting class may be in order. If you've always wondered how the human mind is wired, then take a psychology class.

I recall the first two years of college, taking the required core courses; English, History and Math. I disliked most every class, but as I sifted and filtered through them, I found myself enjoying classes that studied the criminal mind. That's when I decided to study Criminology. I didn't learn this until I was well into my junior year. So, Mitchell with that little bit of information, maybe you too will find out what tweaks and gets you motivated by a sampling of college classes.

Try to stay the educational route for now. Endure the foundational classes while enjoying the electives and don't be too hard on yourself.  This too is a journey. Some of it treacherous, while other ground is exciting and easy. Learn all you can. Keep your antennae up while staying in tune with your own interests. Something will hit and when it does, follow that path with rigor.

 Don't give up; it's too early in the game!




Robert from Memphis, Tennessee asks...

No Harem

Dear Junebug: I decided to get back on Match last Tuesday (after a 7 year hiatus) and have met some lovely women. I put the age range from 38-50. I have been going out with one absolute knock out, age 38, with two kids, 8 and 12. The thing that scares me is that I have been out with 3 women, one of whom is 50, the other two being the 38 year old previously mentioned and a 40 year old (no kids). The two younger women, are very aggressive physically, even on the first date. I don't know how to handle that attitude except with suspicion, because I don't consider myself very special. I have resisted because I have huge trust issues. I have been played for money too many times and the female tool is sexuality.  Nothing new there, right? So, I'm being cool about it even though it's so natural to be tempted. I want ONE special woman, not a harem. I just don't know how to get there from here. Can you steer me in the right direction?

Posted in Dating on Tue, Aug 17th 2010

Find the Diamond

Dear Robert:

I must commend you on rising above the lure of the female body. You are on the right path, but I think I can help direct you by offering a few tips. 

First, if a woman is willing and initiates sleeping with you on the first date, you had better run from her no matter how "knock out" she is.  Besides the fact that she may be carrying who knows what STD, her aggressiveness is a sure sign that she has no respect for herself or the sanctity of intimate love; which is a gift from the Lord designed specifically for the institution of marriage. 

Second, a key word for you to remember while you are doing this on-line dating isSLOW. Take your time with each person you choose to date. Get to know her interests, desires, and beliefs surveying how they line up with your own. Keep the physical out of the relationships as much as possible.

Third, do not mention money, your career or anything that has to do with performance. Determine if you have a connection with this woman before you expose your financial success to her. Make sure it's you she falls for, not your money!  

And finally, enjoy the journey. Treasure the time you have with each of the woman you date and look for the diamond. One of these lovely women will have the same standards as you and will be genuine. You must pace yourself and be patient. Don't give in to the lures and seductions many of these women are carelessly throwing around. Wait for the one who doesn't. 

You are on the right track. Stay focused. Have fun and take your time!


Bernie from Ft Lauderdale, FL asks...

Does God answer to anyone?

Dear Junebug: How do you explain the existence of GOD relative to the Holocaust where some 6 million Jews and Gypsies plus others were tortured, starved and killed?

Posted in Religion on Sat, Jul 24th 2010

Do you choose to believe He's good?

Dear Bernie:

First, I believe this torture and mass evil presented here actually proves the existence of God. Realizing that these acts are bad shows that we understand there is an evil and there is also a good! So, if mass genocide, rape or whatever horrific evil represents a supreme evil, then there HAS to be something on the other end of the spectrum that represents a supreme good! This seems to prove there is something that is perfect that plays the role of a supreme good, aka God. Now, that answers the question literally, but in doing so, I haven't proven that this supreme good is our Christian God. I will, however, tell you how "Junebug" deals with this age old question of "how can a good God let bad things happen to innocent people, His very own creation?"

See Bernie, I choose to believe He is the good Creator of all things.  That's because I see Him in the orchestra of nature. I see Him in every single DNA molecule, an original each time.  I see Him in the zillions of galaxies flung far and wide across time and space.  I see Him in the proven historical facts of the Bible that man cannot explain nor refute. I see Him in a life that has been drastically changed and transformed; my own.  And perhaps most profoundly, I see Him in the miracle of birth!  You see Bernie; this is called "faith". Faith is believing without seeing.  Jesus told us so.  When  speaking to "doubting Thomas" Jesus said, "blessed is the man who believes yet has not seen" (John 20:29).

While I don't have all the answers to these most difficult questions, my faith in His goodness, the many miracles I've witnessed myself and my own changed life lends all credibility to His inspired Word, the Bible. I do know God gave us the gift of "free will"(thank God we are not robots) and we live in a fallen world (our choice/Adam and Eve in disobedience), hence the Hitler's, Stalin's and Castro's of this world. But because of my faith in Him, I eagerly await my eternal home in Heaven which is free from all suffering.

I will conclude with two questions for you? Would you believe in God, His Son Jesus and the Holy Spirit, if They, the Trinity, came to visit you today face to face; loving, teaching and performing miracles for you? Or would you do like they did in the ancient Bible times when Jesus walked among His people raising the dead, healing the sick and feeding the poor, yet still they chose not to believe?

Truths to ponder...


Megan from College Park, GA asks...

She heard from the grapevine...

Dear Junebug: What can we do about a neighbor who gossips and carries tales and untruths all around town? We pray for her and try to love her and help her as we can, but, she is most difficult to deal with. Do you have any ideas of how we might better deal with or help this situation?

Posted in Marriage on Sat, Jul 24th 2010

Show the love of Christ where it is scarce.

Dear Megan:

If we could get rid of all the people who cause us pain and heartache, we could be happy, but we'd probably be a bit prideful and remain spiritually immature.

God knows my life has been full of people who hurt, aggravate and gnaw on my nerves. But dear one, at times Father will draw these very people into our lives to help us grow into mature believers so that we can show the love of Christ where it is scarce. Keep doing the right things, and even though it is tempting, never get on her level by gossiping about her. Don't even defend yourself. God will do it for you. Love her and pray for her and keep your distance, of course.

And the next time you hear of her "shenanigans", just smile and thank God for allowing you to be His Jesus right here on Earth. I assure you that all her words will roll off your back, for it will be more about Him rather than you.

"Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven..." (Matt 5:11&12).

Let the insults roll off your back; and you in turn, light up the world!

Go get 'em!


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